


The Little Things

by Arwriter



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Can be interpreted as abuse, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Like a week after, Panic Attacks, Polysanders - Freeform, Post-Episode: Accepting Anxiety, Protective Morality | Patton Sanders, Protectiveness, Self-Esteem Issues, Sort Of, brief misunderstanding, platonic or romantic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:53:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26145181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arwriter/pseuds/Arwriter
Summary: Now that they’re getting to know Virgil, welcoming him as family, the other sides begin to notice behavior they hadn’t picked up on before. Patton just wants him to feel safe.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 5
Kudos: 248





	The Little Things

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah im back at it again but this time its from Patton's point of view so its totally different

They noticed the little things first. 

Logan was likely the first to notice how jumpy Virgil really was now that they were all spending more time together, how sensitive he was to loud noises and sudden movements, but Patton was fairly sure he was the only one to see beyond that. 

It wasn’t hard for Patton to pick up on how quickly Virgil would tense if he sensed one of the other sides were in a particularly bad mood, how he would go quiet if someone raised their voice whether it was directed towards him or not, how he would reach for any excuse to retreat to his room if he thought something was wrong. 

It hadn’t been like that before they’d accepted him. He hadn’t been so scared. 

Or maybe...maybe he had, and they just hadn’t bothered to notice. 

Living either in almost total isolation or with the other dark sides his whole life, it was obvious Virgil wasn’t used to their way of life. He wasn’t used to the kindness and understanding they were offering. 

But that was ok. They would help him. He was family now, and he was learning. He was safe. 

But then...then the small, hidden things became a bit more obvious, and it was clear this wasn’t just Virgil’s general anxiety. 

It was the ‘mug incident,’ as Patton had internally dubbed it, that had finally clued Patton in to how bad it really was. 

Roman, as kind and caring as he was, and how hard he tried, was never one to pick up on subtle signs. 

It was mid afternoon, Virgil perched on the armchair while Logan and Patton stood by the TV mulling over movie options, when Roman stormed in from the kitchen, a broken Disney mug in his hand, deep frown etched on his face. 

It wasn’t genuine anger, Patton knew Roman well enough by now to know that. It was just frustration amped up for the sake of dramatics. 

They all should have realized Virgil wouldn’t know to pick up on that yet. 

“Do any of you want to tell me  _ why,”  _ Roman announced, holding the pieces of the mug in the air. “My beloved Disney mug was left destroyed on the counter?” 

Logan turned to face him, unaffected, adjusting his glasses. “I assume because it broke.” 

“Obviously! Which one of you broke it?” 

“I did the dishes this morning, kiddo,” Patton said, smiling sadly at the broken mug. “It wasn’t broken when I saw it.” 

Logan sighed. “I did not go anywhere near your mug today, Roman. Besides, can’t you just fix it on your--” 

“It’s the principle of it!” Roman whirled around to Virgil, who had been silently watching the exchange with wide eyes. “Alright, emo! Confess to your crime!” 

Virgil actually jumped, fingers curling into the cushions of the chair, shoulders curling up to almost reach his ears. Roman was clearly expecting to banter back and forth, and Patton knew that in any other situation that was exactly what he would have gotten. 

“I-I didn’t break it,” Virgil said, stumbling over his words a bit, refusing to look Roman in the eye. “It wasn’t me.” 

Roman groaned and Patton frowned as Virgil went rigid. The creative side didn’t seem to be picking up on anything unusual, and Logan had gone back to flipping through channels. 

“Oh come  _ on,  _ Virgil! Obviously it was you, you’re usually the last one in the kitchen. It’s not even a big deal, why didn’t you just tell me it was broken?” 

Virgil shook his head, curling further into himself like he was hoping for his hoodie to swallow him up, and Patton slowly rose to his feet when he saw something far too close to genuine panic in his eyes. 

“I didn’t break it,” he said again, somehow even quieter than before. “I didn’t...I-I’m not lying, it wasn’t me, I’m...I haven’t been in the kitchen.” 

“But you--” 

_ “Roman,”  _ Patton said, forcing his tone to stay light. “I was in a hurry this morning, maybe I just left it balancing on the shelf weird. And if not, I’m sure it was just an accident, right?” 

It was a bit too pointed to be taken as entirely casual, and Roman cleared his throat and shifted awkwardly, clearly picking up on Patton’s worry. 

But before Roman could hopefully change the subject, Virgil was speaking again, his voice now shaky and almost...desperate. 

“I didn’t...I didn’t do it, Roman I swear it wasn’t...i-if I had broken it I would have cleaned it up or-or fixed it I promise, I wouldn’t...I wouldn’t have-have left a mess.” 

Roman’s brow furrowed, and he briefly glanced back at Patton and Logan, whose attention had been recaptured by Virgil’s rambling. 

“I...I know,” Roman said carefully. “Virgil, I...I wasn’t gonna--” 

He took a step towards the armchair, freezing when Virgil flinched backwards, eyes impossibly wide and clouded with fear. 

“I-I didn’t break it!” It was louder this time, still small and trembling, staring at the other side like he was wielding a deadly weapon. “I’m not lying I swear I-I didn’t, I…” 

Patton could only stand there, looking helplessly between the two of them, Logan just as lost beside him, while Roman carefully set the mug down and slowly dropped to a crouch in front of the chair. 

“It’s ok, Virgil,” the prince says, soft and slow, and Virgil’s rambling abruptly cut off. “I’m not mad, see? It’s ok.” 

Virgil didn’t relax, didn’t move, just glanced briefly at Patton and Logan before turning back to Roman. “You...you were. You were mad, and you--” 

“I wasn’t,” Roman promised gently. “Even if you did break it--” 

“I didn’t,” Virgil insisted, then stiffened as if just realizing he’d interrupted Roman. But the prince just smiled again, extending an open palm. 

“I know. I believe you. I’m not mad, I was just messing around. I’m so sorry, Virgil. You didn’t do anything wrong.” 

It took a moment for anything to change, Patton sending reassuring smiles and Logan quietly counting out a pattern for Virgil to regain control over his breathing. Roman didn’t move, kneeled beside the chair with his arm outstretched and waiting. 

When Virgil finally began to relax, his eyes clearing a bit, he let out a shaky sigh and warily took Roman’s hand, still visibly tense like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop. 

“Kiddo?” Patton called after a moment, taking a careful step forward. “You alright?” 

He saw Virgil nod, swallowing roughly. “I’m fine,” he muttered. “Sorry for...sorry about that.” 

Logan frowned, moving to stand beside Patton. “I fail to see what you could have to apologize for, Virgil.” 

Virgil shrugged and rested his chin on his knees, but he still held on to Roman’s hand like a lifeline, and the Prince made no move to pull away. 

“My sincerest apologies,” Roman said. “It wasn’t my intention to scare you. I mean, I’d be a rather lousy excuse for creativity if I couldn’t fix a little broken mug, right? It wouldn’t have been a bother even if you  _ had  _ broken it.” 

It got a small, unsure smile from Virgil, but the anxious side still didn’t look particularly calmed. 

“Besides,” Logan spoke up, something unreadable in his expression. “A broken dish is nothing that should cause you distress. I’m sure you know you can always inform us if an accident happens without consequence.” 

It took a moment for Virgil to answer, hands fisting the cloth of his new hoodie, but he eventually nodded, not looking like he entirely believed what he was being told. 

“Yeah,” he said, voice strained. “Yeah, I just thought...I don’t know. It’s whatever, you guys. I’m fine.” 

They begrudgingly dropped the subject after that, seeing as how keeping the spotlight on Virgil was only succeeding in making him more uneasy, but Patton was sure to make very clear that his door was open if Virgil ever wanted to talk about it. 

It had been a little over a week now, and no one had mentioned the incident again, instead going back to focusing on how to make sure Virgil felt safe and included like they had since learning his name. 

They were all getting closer, even in the short time since accepting him, and Virgil was visibly relaxing. He was still anxious and withdrawn, but less so every day. Things were getting better. 

And then…

And then things got worse. 

Virgil was having an off day. They could all see he was a bit extra jumpy and unfocused throughout the day. 

It made sense, Thomas had been particularly stressed and Virgil, as his anxiety, was handling the brunt of it. But he hadn’t locked himself up in his room like he would have done a week prior, and Patton considered that a win. 

Virgil had finally started eating with them regularly as well, more often than not hanging around long enough to help with prep and cleanup. 

The four of them were cooking dinner tonight, careful to keep the atmosphere calm and lighthearted, and Patton wanted to squeal with happiness each time he saw a tentative smile cross Virgil’s face. 

Patton and Logan were handling most of the food while Virgil and Roman washed, dried and put away dishes as they went, the prince humming Disney songs loud enough for everyone to hear. 

It was nice. They were finally a family, just as they should be. 

Honestly, what happened next was entirely Patton’s fault. He hadn’t even been thinking about how the other side might interpret it. 

The kitchen was roomy but it wasn’t huge, and it was a bit crowded with all four of them working in it at the same time. Patton was moving away from checking the stove just as Virgil was moving to put a clean plate away and ended up bumping into his shoulder as he made his way back to Logan. 

It happened so fast, Patton didn’t even get a chance to try and catch the plate as it slipped from Virgil’s hands and hit the ground with a crash, shattering into pieces. 

It wasn’t a big deal. Things broke all the time. In the mindscape, especially with Roman, they could clean it up and snap a new one into existence in moments. For a second, Patton didn’t think anything of it. 

“Whoops,” he said, stepping away from the glass shards. “Sorry about that, kiddo. You ok there?” 

There wasn’t an answer, and when Patton looked up he realized Virgil wasn’t even looking at him. He was staring at Logan. 

Logan, who had turned around at the sound of the noise, knife still in hand from chopping vegetables, watching with a mix of concern and confusion. And Virgil’s expression held more terror than Patton had ever seen. 

“Virgil--” 

“I-I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he managed, Logan only seemed more confused when Virgil only seemed to focus on him. “I-I didn’t...It was an accident.” 

“We know Virgil,” Logan said carefully, but the reassurance only seemed to panic Virgil more, wide eyes moving now to all three watching sides. “We are not--” 

“Lo,” Patton called softly, heart breaking when he saw where Virgil’s eyes kept landing. “You need to put that down, kiddo.” 

Logan cocked his head slightly, eyes widening when he followed Patton’s gaze to the knife still clutched in his hand. “My apologies, Virgil. I hadn’t realized.” 

And maybe Logan moved a bit too fast, maybe Virgil was too far gone in his panic to hear the apology, but moving to set the knife down on the counter behind him only seemed to break the dam holding back the last of Virgil’s fear. 

He jumped back, Patton wincing in sympathy when his back collided with the edge of the counter, but he didn’t even seem to register the impact. 

“I’m sorry, I-I’m so s-sorry, please, please I-I’ll clean it up! I’ll clean it up right now y-you don’t have to be mad I won’t...please, I can fix it, I can--” 

Patton would hate himself for it later, but in his desperation Virgil was lowering himself towards the broken glass, eyes never leaving Logan, moving like he was going to grab the shards with his bare hands, and parental instinct took over. 

“No!” Patton hurried forwards to stop him, and while he did get Virgil away from the glass, the outburst and sudden movements were definitely not what Virgil needed. 

The anxious side’s eyes filled with tears as he scrambled as far back as he could get, breathing quick and erratic, words coming out in frantic gasps. 

“Sorry, sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean to...I’m so sorry I just thought--” 

“No, no it’s ok!” Patton’s vision was beginning to go blurry with his own tears. “I just didn’t want you to get cut on the glass.” 

But Virgil wasn’t listening, pressed up against the wall, hands moving to protect his face like he expected someone to hurt him. 

It was so much different from the Virgil they’d gotten to know, scared and anxious sometimes but refusing to let himself fall apart in front of anyone, always holding himself to some standard of composure. 

Roman was clutching Patton’s arm, keeping him from rushing forward again, the prince pale and frozen. Logan had set the knife down, clearly doing all he could to compose himself and understand the situation. 

“Virgil,” the logical side said after a moment, more hesitant than Patton had ever heard him. “It was just an accident. Nobody is going to be upset with you. And I assure you, nobody here would ever have any intention of causing you harm.” 

“Of course not,” Roman said, Patton quickly agreeing. “What on earth made you so frightened, Stormcloud?” 

Virgil didn’t answer, gaze still jumping from one side to another, tense and trembling as he seemed to struggle to understand what was being said to him. 

“I...I’m sorry,” he said after a moment. It seemed to be his go-to phrase tonight. “I didn’t m-mean to ruin things.” 

“Oh, sweetie,” Patton said, still unable to move forward, furiously wiping tears from his cheeks. “You didn’t ruin anything. I promise.” 

“I…I’m s...I’m sorry.” 

“Perhaps,” Logan said suddenly. “It would be of benefit to you to discuss this outside the kitchen. Do you require assistance getting to the living room?” 

Virgil was still trembling, curled into a ball, eyes red and jaw clenched tight. “I...I think so. Sorry, I just--” 

“You have nothing to be sorry for, kiddo.” Patton glanced at the glass scattered across the floor, then at Roman, the only side still wearing shoes. “Will you--?” 

“I’ve got him.” 

It took a minute, Patton moving to stand by Logan while Roman carefully made his way to Virgil’s side like he was approaching a wounded animal. 

Patton didn’t miss how badly Virgil flinched when Roman lowered himself to the floor, how tense he went when the prince made a move to touch his arm. 

“I won’t hurt you,” Roman said softly. “You have my word. Can I carry you to the couch, please?” 

Virgil nodded, hesitant, and Patton’s heart broke at the quiet whimper that escaped when Roman carefully lifted him bridal style from the kitchen floor. 

“You’re alright,” Princey promised, sending a worried glance over his shoulder as Logan turned off the stove. “You’re safe, you’re ok. We’re almost there.” 

They made it to the couch quickly, Patton and Logan following closely behind, the three of them allowing Virgil his own space as soon as he was set down on the cushion. 

He instantly took advantage of it, pressing himself as far back as he could, knees pulled up to his chest, refusing to look any of them in the eye. 

Logan was seated on the coffee table across from him, Patton carefully lowering himself onto the opposite end of the couch, Roman perched beside him on the arm. 

Logan cleared his throat, hands folded in his lap. “Virgil--” 

“I-I don’t know,” Virgil said, still horribly small and shaky. “I’m sorry I just...thought y-you would all be angry with me. Again. If I...I-if I messed up and then I did and I thought...I thought--”

“Nobody’s angry,” Patton said. “Never over something like this Virge. And even if we were...you don't ever need to be  _ afraid  _ of us.” 

Virgil hunched his shoulders, staring resolutely down at his lap. “I’m sorry. I should have...I’m sorry.” 

“It’s--” 

“I just-” Virgil took a breath, knuckles turning white in his grip, the three sides falling silent as they waited, hoping silently. “I just don't...I don’t want to leave.” 

Logan tilted his head, confused, looking to the others who were equally perplexed. “Leave...where? We of course would never force you to go to your room if you’d prefer company.” 

Virgil shook his head, briefly squeezing his eyes shut, and Patton’s chest clenched in sympathy as he watched him fight to get his thoughts together. 

“I mean I don’t...want to go back. This has all been really great. You’ve...you guys have been really great. And I know you-you didn’t really like me before and now that you know you n-need-need me you could...you could do whatever you want to me if I f-fuck up or...or make me leave and I don’t want to...to lose this.” 

“Oh, baby…” Patton scooted forward, unsure how to respond, feeling his heart break in two. “Can I...Virgil, can I hug you?” 

Virgil’s gaze shot up from his lap, shocked, but he nodded and let Patton wrap his arms around him, crying at how badly he was shaking beneath his hoodie, pulling him against his chest. 

The anxious side’s breath hitched, and Patton just held him tighter as he finally dissolved into sobs, clutching at Patton’s shirt like he thought he would be ripped away at any second. 

Like Patton would ever let him go. 

“It’s ok, kiddo,” he promised. “It’s alright. You’re family now, remember? Nothing’s gonna happen to you.” 

“Indeed.” At some point, Logan had gotten up from the coffee table to sit beside them, carefully putting a comforting hand on Virgil’s back. “Even if we were angry over something, it would be an issue we could easily work out. Together. You never need to be afraid of losing us.” 

The logical side began to rub soothing circles along Virgil’s hoodie, a clear attempt to help him settle down, while Roman cautiously scooted forward and placed his palm over Virgil’s hand, Patton still holding on tight. 

“You’re one of us now,” Princey said. “Which means I am sworn to protect you! As long as I live and breathe, you’ll never be alone again! No harm shall ever--” 

“Alright, Roman,” Patton said, gazing fondly at a now grinning Virgil. “I think he gets it.” 

Virgil gave a small nod, pulling back slightly from Patton’s embrace, breaths still tiny, hiccuping sobs. “Yeah. Uh, thanks, you guys for...yeah. Thank you.” 

“No need to thank us for stating the truth,” Logan said. “However, based on your reaction tonight, and the fact that this is not the first time something like this has happened, the logical conclusion is that this mindset is not a new occurrence. Am I correct?” 

Patton thought about the broken mug, how terrified Virgil had looked when he’d thought they were upset with him, how he’d practically begged Roman to believe him when the prince had advanced. He thought about how tense Virgil would get whenever someone would raise their voice. 

It was becoming more and more of a struggle not to start crying again. 

“I guess so,” Virgil murmured, cheeks flushed red. “I mean, I’m literally Anxiety. I’ve had some, uh, bad experiences, I guess.” 

“Kiddo--” 

“No, no it’s fine!” Patton didn’t miss how tightly Virgil was squeezing Roman’s hand now. “It’s my fault, it’s...I should have said something. I should’ve...warned you guys, and I’m r-really sorry.” 

Roman leaned forward, brow pinched. “Warned us?” 

“About all of this,” Virgil said, like it was something obvious. “I’m not...easy to deal with. You guys know that already but it’s not just my function, it’s...it’s just me. I’m difficult and I-I don’t know how to fix it and I’m really s--” 

“But we don’t  _ want  _ you to fix it,” Patton exclaimed before Virgil could apologize again. “We care about  _ you,  _ kiddo! Everyone’s gonna have flaws and setbacks,  _ all  _ of us, but that’s why you have family!” 

“We do want you to feel safe here,” Logan added. “We’re all willing to assist you in feeling more comfortable. But we have no desire to change or fix you. I for one, have quite enjoyed getting to know you properly.” 

Patton and Logan agreed without hesitation, beaming when Virgil hesitantly met each of their gazes. He looked like he was seconds away from bursting into tears again, but this time it would be from something much different than fear and devastation. 

“Oh,” he said, small but hopeful. “I...ok. Uh, same. To the...to the getting to know you guys thing. It’s been...it’s been really good.” 

Patton smiled, giving Virgil one last squeeze before scooting back, clapping his hands together. 

“I’m glad, kiddo,” he said. “You still up for dinner? Logan might even let us have ice cream for dessert!” 

“Uh, yeah,” Virgil managed, Roman leading him to his feet while Logan rolled his eyes with a fond smile. “I-I’m good.” 

“Excellent!” Roman was already making his way back to the kitchen. “I’ll clean up the glass and then we can continue!” 

“I can help if you--”

“Nonsense!” Roman disappeared around the corner, already belting another Disney song, and Patton carefully took Virgil’s hands in his. 

He was still a bit wary, but Patton could practically see him fighting against it, battling every instinct screaming at him to pull away, isolate himself out of self defense. 

But he was still here. Still learning to love. 

Patton couldn’t be more proud. 

“Come on,” he said, pulling him towards the stairs. “No bare feet tonight, just to be safe. Don’t worry, I’ll let you borrow some of my fuzzy socks.” 

  
  



End file.
